A Doormat No More
By Susan Eileen Walker
Back Cover Blurb
Note from pearls:
I know this doesn't seem to fit our usual romance genre. But what greater romance is there than learning to love yourself. Sometimes you have to make your own HEA. The Inner Goddess motto is about empowering women to be true to themselves, one book at a time. We hope A Doormat No More helps more women nurture their Inner Goddess.
Excerpt
“What does your husband have to say
about you becoming an enforcement agent?” Cody asked the next morning after she
opened the office. He tossed aside the paper he had been reading while she went
through her morning routine. She glanced down and saw that he had been reading
her list of questions.
She tried to maintain eye contact with him, but had to
glance away time and again to look over his shoulder, out the window, anywhere
but in those piercing eyes. He saw too much when she met his gaze. She swallowed
hard and dropped her gaze to her hands. The two gold bands on her left ring
finger were nicked and scratched. The one-third carat diamond winked at her as
if it knew a secret.
Raising her head she straightened her shoulders. She
forced herself to meet his inquisitive gaze. “He doesn’t know I’m thinking
about it.”
“Don’t you think you should talk to him?” Cody asked. He
sounded surprised that she kept such a decision to herself.
“Why? It’s none of his business,” she said, sounding
bitter even to herself. She fought the urge to duck under her desk.
Cody’s gaze sharpened. His eyes narrowed for few seconds
while he studied her. Then he relaxed and picked up his travel mug. “Does he
hit you? Hurt you? Beat on you?”
“No,” she said, dropping her gaze again. Her fingers were
knotted together on top of the desk. “He’s never raised a hand to me. He’s
never had to. His words do enough damage.” She jumped when a tear landed on her
fingers, wet and burning hot. Talking about the failing relationship added to
the pain instead of detracting from it.
“You should leave him if he hurts you, even if he only
uses words,” Cody said, his deep voice gentler than she ever heard before.
“I plan to. But it takes money to start over. Apartments,
divorces and just plain living cost money,” she pointed out, wiping away her
tears with shaking fingers. “He doesn’t know I’m working. I hope to save my
paychecks for a few months until I have enough to leave,” she said, outlining
her goal. “Problem is, I’ll probably need a second job once I’m on my own. I
thought you could train me to be a bail enforcement agent. That way I’ll be
able to support myself once I leave Matthew by working here and doing bail
enforcement as well.”
She glanced up when Cody stood. His expression chilled her
to the bone. He turned and stalked from the room. She stood to follow until she
heard a string of inventive curses,
which stopped her in her tracks. She stopped halfway across the room. Her
shoulders drew up as if she were a turtle pulling into its shell. Her arms
wrapped around her middle to protect herself and then the shaking began. Cody
was mad and it was her fault.
What would he do? Would he call Matthew and share her
secret? Or hunt him down and hold a “come to Jesus” meeting about how to treat
a woman?
She found herself barely breathing as she waited for Cody
to calm down. Would he fire her? Or just yell at her for being stupid? When the
back door slammed and glass shattered, she jumped. She rushed into the hall
that ran down the center of the house. Cody was standing outside the back door
looking at her through the hole where glass had been just moments before.
She froze mid step, waiting for a second explosion. In her
experience men who did something as destructive as shattering a window never
dealt well with the aftermath. Before she could apologize his lips stretched
into a wide grin and then he began to chuckle.
She stared at him, afraid to move. Matthew often smiled
too, just before attacking her with a verbal backhand. When she got upset at
his words, he would take offense. “I was only teasing,” he’d say. “You really
need to learn how to take a joke.”
But his insults were not jokes. They were degrading,
belittling, cutting comments. With each slap, each insult, she faded,
eventually becoming the human doormat Matthew walked upon on a regular basis.
“Are you all right?” she asked in a small voice. She
braced herself for anger.
“I’m fine, but JJ was right. That old door didn’t survive
my temper. Could you wake him up and tell him to go buy a new door? I’ll clean
the glass up later.”
She nodded. As he turned away, she called, “I’m sorry.”
Cody
paused, then turned back to face her. He looked serious, somber, but not angry.
“Why are you sorry? I broke the glass,” he said.
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Author Interview
To start this off, why don't you give an idea of what the book is
about?
She is the journey of a emotionally and sexually
abused woman from the decision of “I can’t life like this any more”, through
getting strong, getting kicked out of her home and then rebuilding her life and
filing for divorce.
Where did you grow up and was reading and writing a part of your life?
Reading, writing and daydreaming were major parts of my life
growing up. I could leave the peaceful
existence of my life and have grand adventures.
My grandmother and mother both encouraged my reading. The summer I turned 14 I read the entire
Nancy Drew collection, which my grandmother bought me at a used bookstore.
Who were your earliest influences and why?
My mother was one of the greatest influences on my life. She was creative and talented and let nothing
stop her when she made up her mind to do something. In writing, Dr. Seuss, Carolyn Keen, the
Bronte sisters and my 8th grade English teacher, Ms. Painter. She was the first to encourage my writing.
What would a typical day be like for a writer?
I’m not sure about other writers, but
my intense creative spells last about an hour.
If I am able to get in two writing sessions a day I feel very
lucky. But in those few minutes my hand
flies across the page or the keyboard and I am usually able to squeeze out
about a thousand new words a day. When rewriting or editing, I can usually work
for longer periods.
When my son was young I had to fit my
writing time in around him, my husband and my job, which meant I was writing at
5 a.m. before anyone else was up. I also learned to divide my attention. Nowadays I find writing in coffee shops and
restaurants very productive. Pulling out
my notebook also gets me great service in restaurants. I also go to the first showing of a movie as
soon as the doors open and sit and write while waiting for the movie to
start. People look at me funny, but I
get a lot done.
How long have you been writing and in what capacities?
I’ve been writing with the goal of
being published for about 20 years now.
Of course, the first 15 years worth of stories are hiding in boxes in my
office closet. In the last five and a
half years I’ve had four young adult novels and one children’s book published
under Susan Eileen Walker. She is my
first novel for women, which is why the name change.
Which is more difficult to write - Fiction or
nonfiction and why?
Has there ever been a time when you wanted to throw in the towel
and give up? And if so, how did you defeat those instincts?
What is the hardest part about being a writer?
Do you have any hobbies? What are they? How do they enhance your writing?
I knit/crochet, read and daydream. The knitting allows my hands to stay busy while my mind is free to wander. Reading and daydreaming keep the ideas percolating. I have a lot more ideas than I’ll ever have time to write, but I think most writers do.
Articles and media alike make it sound as though the only way to
rise to the top is to sacrifice. What do you find to be good sacrifices?
Because I live in New Bern, North Carolina, everyone asks me if
I’ve met Nicholas Sparks, who also lives here.
The answer is no.
I was doing a book signing in the house which is the backdrop for
101 Borden Street and a woman came into the room shaking and grinning from ear
to ear. She told me that she’d read my
book four times and was so excited to be in the house and actually meeting
me. She bought a second book that day so
she could loan it to friends because she didn’t want to loan out her copy, she
was getting ready to read it again!
Everyone who had read any of my books falls in love immediately,
tells me they could not put the books down and that I have to have that story
made into a movie. I have had people
complain that when thought they’d read a chapter or two before going to sleep
at night they ended up staying awake until the wee hours of the morning because
they just had to find out what happened next and ended up reading the entire
book in one sitting.
Do you think that as a writer you are more prone to watching what goes on around you and observing behaviors than most people are are?
Yes, I’m always watching people interact and eavesdropping on
interesting conversations.
Who are some of the authors you consider to be "don't miss"?
Janet Evanovich, Susan Elizabeth Phillips, Debra Clopton, Judy
Baer.
If one were looking to start his/her own career as a writer, what
would you suggest his/her first step to be?
Romantic comedies and thought provoking dramas. Amazing Grace, Because I Said So, The Devil
Wears Prada, 27 Dresses, PS I Love You
What is your favorite city to visit, but one that you wouldn’t want to live in?
The Washington DC area. My family lives in Northern Virginia. I love to visit them and the city, but when I get there I park my car and lock the doors then let my father or brother chauffeur me around.
What’s the best part of being a writer?
Getting to share my stories with other people and hopefully
touching their hearts or giving them something to think about.
What's next?
I’m
currently working on a sequel to my children’s book I Am the Quigglebush Bear entitled I Know the Quigglebush Heroes.
I am also playing with the idea for a sequel that would incorporate
characters from She as well as
characters from my novel Maura’s Trunk,
which was published in 2004.
Susan Eileen Walker was born in Maryland, a state her family never lived in. At the age of five, she fell in love with books and decided she would join those who created such magic.
Susan currently lives in eastern North Carolina with her sixty-five pound mixed breed furbaby, Honey, who is a combination protector, personal trainer, and alarm clock.
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